Smile! Here's The New Fake

Alrighty then. I got a new crown today.

The story goes I broke my a bit of my front left tooth when I was 12. A simple enamel replacement was done which consequently broke when I was 13. The replacement was with a pin. It gave way a year later, to be replaced with a screw and enamel job.

That lasted till last week, 18 yrs, browning with all the tea, coffee and curry I've had. Vanity gave me a reason to spend part of my bonus on my mouth. So voila.

Late Late Curry

I was terribly late for Kim's potluck party. I had asked my mother to make chicken curry for the event and she obliged. She likes to cook and will oblige despite the initial huffing and puffing. She made the curry real spicy. Dangerous kind.

The potluck was organised to celebrate Kim's new adventure. She's going off to Dubai to be a flight attendant on Emirates. A bold change from creative concepting and flash design.

The blur images are not testimony to the quality of my Canon camera. Nor do they attest to my state of drunkenness that night. Instead it is my insistence on flashlessness and perpetual hope for the best, even in digital photography. There is more planned for Kim before she scoots off in uniform. The Air Supply kind of plan.

Introducing And Updating

This is Mun Hoe, recently promoted Senior Art Director. Churning out good work at the speed of lightning and an unrelenting perfectionist (unless he's sick of the job), he deserves his status in the company. He judges people, rolling them into little balls of dust to be flicked off his shoulder without a second look. Haha, quite a character he is. All new people are instantly beneath him and get under his skin. I'll relate a one-year-and-three-months story some other time. It takes a while to peel off the Mun Hoe layer and once you get to know him a little, he's a sweet guy, haha.




That's me. I was told I lost weight. Whooppee.












Jorida is doing well in her new job. She's being herself, bike gear and all. She misses us, she misses the chemistry between AMs and PMs and the crap we share and laugh about. But it's ok, she's a rock. Sorry, rok.









Georgina is one of the most capable persons I know. She's smart and witty, corny and crappy, brilliant and bimbo. She can be unprepared for a meeting and still make sure she's in control. Ay caramba. She can nudge you with her index finger until you wanna bite the finger off. I jest. Hmm.








Ravi. There he goes with his thumb again. The thumb of God we are calling it, maybe after Maradona's goal in 1986. Ravi is after all a player, of the ball. Football is one of his passions and he is a Man U fan. Bugger. Forgiven because he's funny :)









This the latest in many Cheryl Lim Lah Moh pics on my blog. Cheryl recently acquired a new job. To complete her life, she also got a dog. When announced over MSN some Sundays ago, it caused a torrent of concern. What, when, where, why and how were used many times during the long trail of comments. The dog is a toy poodle. She calls it Tommy (the reasons behind the name are too lame to blog about. Not yet anyway), I call the dog Vuitton. Georgina prefers Prada. The dog apparently won't grow bigger than twice an A4 sheet of paper. I am a big dog person, so I don't know if Vuitton and I will hit it off. We'll see, soon I hope.



These were the cherries in my Gunner. I think I was the only one with two cherries. Doesn't that sound wrong? Then I miss the bus home. Well, circle of life and the ball is round. That kind of thing.

Current State Of Mind

Well, it's a little blank. I hope my future boss isn't reading this.

I suppose it's a 2-weeks-to-a-new-job feeling. I am still having work at work, handing over is taking longer than usual. There are 2 projects that are hanging in the proverbial balance, do or die, fly or fail, drunk milk or spilt milk. I am overstating the facts, of course, and for the benefit of the clients, all is well :) Haha.

I guess I am trying to hold off the inevitable mushiness. Yes I am going to miss the fruit that arrives twice a week. Yes I am going to miss the fact that there is dot Nap (Insiders will know. Send resumes to me to find out more.) Yes I will miss the fact the pantry is bigger than my room at home. Yes I will miss the silly conversations that happen in mid-travel between meeting room and work table. The view, my God, the view. See this ancient post as reference.

And yes I will miss the people. The people make any company, not any technology, not the politics, not the pantry. Well maybe the pantry. The people I work with are good at what they do, they help one another to give their clients the best, and they take the company forward. The people who don't make the company are best enjoyed with a pinch of salt, good dose of humour and sometimes at arm's length with a beer.

Sigh and smile.

Eat Some Salad You Fat Bastard

Go to the site, please! http://www.youfatbastard.com.au The video is hilarious! Can't question the Aussie sense of humour, eh mate.

Lessons

A cool way to learn old lessons. Mau for everyone.

Party Up In Ubi

After Arnold's, the entourage ventured to the newly formalised abode of June and Kok Leong (Remember them from this earlier posting?), a beautifully done up maisonette in Ubi.

The journey is half the enjoyment. We did City Plaza, DVDs, clothes and all; posed with a police car in the carpark; sang Sister Sledge's We Are Family to the wrong crowd; stopped at a obscure carpark to buy a carton of presents from a neighbourhood Minimart (why is the Heiny carton lighter than the Cberg carton?); speculated about old age having spied 4 elderly ladies and 1 elderly man hanging out; and made sharp turns to the right HDB carpark.

We crashed the party already in mid-big-makan. We were stuffed so we took the tour; raided the DVDs; and hung out in the space between the dining area and kitchen. We questioned the newly married couple about reno costs, espresso machines and neighbours. I was introduced to the coffee cup of all coffee cups - a silvered container that has a vacuum layer between inner and outer surfaces so that you can hold a cup of steaming coffee without the ouch. First chicken, now coffee cup. Amazing evening.

The silly antics and cuckoo conversation made it complete.

Super Chicken

"Oh my God" It was a stifled reaction when i bit into the breast. Tender, juicy, golden brown and perfect. Last Saturday, I was invited to partake on God's gift to chicken-obsessed man - Arnold's. I had to travel far and wide (Woodlands to Paya Lebar) and traverse hurdles (namely large roads and MRT construction) to arrive at the mall of malls. City Plaza is a throw back to the 70s, an icon of economic progress just outside the hubbub of the city and Geylang. Although you may wonder if you need a passport to walk into the hallowed halls of City Plaza, you will understand the reason why you are there when you make your way to level 2, drawn by the magnificent aroma of freshly fried chicken.

Seriously, the chicken is amazing. And I was fortunate enough to be introduced to this delight by Zul, who invited me and fellow friends to enjoy this meal of meals. Kim, Furqan and Edwin were there when I arrived late, already having consumed half of the 15 pieces they had ordered. I had 3 pieces, with whipped potato and coleslaw and washed it down with lemon tea.

Folks, you have to try this chicken if you haven't already done so. Soon, Arnold's will be an institution. The queue outside is evidence, of greatness and immortality. Go, now.

Fart Social Science

I was in the office pantry this morning to get a drink of water when I let one go. A gaseous emission from my anus. A fart to keep it simple and layman. Considering I was alone in a large 5m by 3m by 3m space, I figured that it was green light to rip. Yes, I did have the option to keep it in and fester and trouble my colon. Yes, I did think about as would you have in most "should I or should I not" voluntary bodily function decision-making situations. Yes, I let it rip.

It evacuated my body with slight sound. Satisfied yet indifferent, I proceeded to get a glass of water from the dispenser (a one-third two-third mix of hot and cold). Then a colleague, Simon, walked into the room.

Alarm bells! So at this point, the farter has another decision to make. General post-emission contingencies dictate pretence and a laissez-faire approach to the introduction of native species to the field of emission. This means keeping quiet and hoping for the best. No fingers pointing and no fingers pointed. However, this plan does not work in a bi-occupied space. Come on, it could just you or me, he or she, she and it. In my case, it's worse - simple deductive reasoning and adequate nasal sensitivity on the part of my colleague, the fartee, will put me to blame. The only person in the room must be the criminal.

What I did was admit.
"Hey, i just farted."
"Oh really?"
"Yeah, you should smell it soon."
Sniffs. "No."
"Oh, you should. I smell it already. Whoa."
"Nope."
"You will lah. Fart travels at 20 metres a second."
"Oh really? I didn't know that,"
"Yeah some scientists figured that out."

The last few lines transpired as we both left the pantry.

Here's your takeaway. Even in the afore-described situation, do not give in to blame so quickly. Ask if the intruding party smells something foul (or fowl if you had chicken the night before, haha). If he/she says yes, admit to the crime. You do the crime, be prepared to do the time. If he/she says no (as a result of inadequate nasal sensitivity), then you simply say ok and leave quickly, depart scot-free into cleaner, odourless air. Voila.

I might discuss the science of fart in a later blog entry. I feel it coming on.

Have You Seen This Man?

Helping a needy friend.

Eat Your Family Day

This Friday is "Eat With Your Family" day. So the company is letting us off an hour earlier to go home and consume dinner with our loved ones. We got the announcement for the event via email a little while ago.

In the spirit of good humour, I have sent an email entitled "Eat Your Family Day", inspired by Ravi who happened to get rid of the preposition 'with' in a small conversation on MSN a little after the email appeared in our Inboxes.

----

Since fifteen minutes ago, the Ministry of Family Relations and Societal Concerns has decided to implement “Eat Your Family Day”. This event is aimed at relieving the stress of family life by removing members while fulfilling one’s dietary requirements. The ministry aims to improve the psychological well-being of the working class by assisting them in directly removing physical liabilities and burdens.

We recommend eating up younger siblings and fat folk first. The former irritate the hell out of most economic contributors by asking for money and bragging about their better skin and freer lifetstyles. Fat persons will generally consume more resources, from food to clothing and space in MRT trains. We suggest their consumption over a barbeque with large helpings of salad.

As we are all one big family, it is also advisable that we share. Please invite your colleagues to take a bite out of your family members. Remember, variety is the spice of life.

Thank you

Mr Ma Kan Liao
Perm Sec
Ministry of Family Relations and Societal Concerns

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So far i've got a "Hahahahaahahahah " and a "Mr Ma Kan Liao, you si beh bo liao!!" in response.

Pink, the hate of - a pre-lunch discussion

Just past noon today, I initiated into a discussion of a pink monkey. It was lying on the In tray of a partition-separated, neighbouring colleague, Kien Wai (here's a link to his Friendster page). He is a rich media developer. No, he does not own a newspaper and sidelines in housing. He builds websites instead. Anyway, I asked about his pink tendencies and he brusquely denied them, professing that the said monkey toy was a gift. Ok, we believe you. It sounded like a good online name thought. "Pink monkey" or "Blue Chihuahua" or "Angryparrot89". You know, like those.

Having mentioned that there are people I know who hate pink, he pointed to Edalene (linked here as insomnicbitch). We then pursued a path of no return, a challenging battle to determine the preference of pink in terms of shade. (Note the embedded examples of vintage can of cherry drink and pink plastic toy soldier as hue references.) Edalene clarified her demands on the colour - it has to one of two shades. An almost white shade which we are referring to as ICI or Nippon Paint rose white and a bright pink which can only be accepted on a black background. She also provided me a link to http://www.bitchwhocodes.com and wished the pink was more intense. Hmm. Eventually we confirmed the following pink of choice - refer to accompanying JPEG below with colour code reference, gladly provided by said partial-pinker.

Somewhere in this conversation, I mentioned ingestion of pink items. Cake and Bandung were highlighted, items Edalene prefers not to consume (weight watching pink hater). It turns out there's this other girl in the office, Shamie, who hates pink and also hates Bandung. Note that these 2 items are taken as separate entities of displeasure, not to be grouped because of colour. (I have only a MSN shot of Shamie. This animal is not her.) Edalene doesn't like Bandung too. Poor rose syrup-milk drink. I like Bandung. Sweeet and crreeeamy.

It was a thoroughly engaging pre-lunch 20mins.

A Bite Of The Apple

It is done. Got my MacBook on Monday afternoon at the office. No hoohah. Am getting used to being a Mac user. It takes a while. Bon voyage and here's to happy times.

Goodbye Bill

I've done it. It was a leap of faith, jumping across the trench of personal-computing lifestyle-choice to the white side.

From where I came, there were many options - many purveyors, many types and models, with little uniqueness and great commonality of look and feel, of features and of problems. Yes, there was many a problem.

On the white side, there is a great uniform aura of completeness and calm. There exists a feeling of reassurance and collective tranquility. It is said that often a sigh of relief is heard across the land when a committed one traverses the bridge to the white side, and is welcomed by those who came before him with open arms and open minds. There is comfort.

Soon I will be part of the minority, albeit an ever-influential minority. The change will come and soon. Goodbye Bill. Hello Steve baby.

Oh, to cut the crap, I bought a Mac.

Post 101 - Ice Cream For The Betterment Of Mankind

While having the delectable afore-blogged ice cream, I came thinking about world politics.

The basic thought here is 'If everyone had ice-cream, the world would be a better place". Ice-cream is the kind of food that is nice. Apart from sweet, creamy and delicious, nice is a good word to describe the emotional appeal of the dessert. (Calling ice-cream 'dessert' does not in any way discount the consumption of ice cream as a breakfast, lunch or dinner entree item.) If we all felt nicer, maybe we wouldn't be picking so many fights with one another.

Sometimes we get thorny because we feel like we're missing out. Chill dude, all that anger and frustration could be put to rest with a little cool scoop of vanilla. Small bites of creamy, sugary, icy-cold temptation would calm an angry soul. If Saddam had some ice-cream when he got pissed, may be wouldn't have been such a tyrant. Perhaps we can send the people of North Korea and their leader a whole batch of Chunky Monkey before we begin 6-party talks over nuclear disarmament.

You don't see upset people eating ice-cream, do you? Consumers (yes, literal consumers) of ice-cream are calm, unflustered individuals with a zen-like serenity, with a rational head and raised blood sugar levels (whoops!). Or they attain this state of enlightenment after a few mouthfuls of the good stuff. (We have seen countless examples of post-dump people on TV feel so much better after a pint.) Mid- or post-ingestion, they make good sweet decisions and help with the dishes.

Ice-cream for everyone! Someone tell the UN and pay Nestle or Tip-Top or some other major ice-cream manufacturers to distribute ice-cream worldwide at low cost to governments. Ice-cream to emancipate the down-trodden and cool the hot-headed! Creamy goodness to fill stomachs and elevate serotonin levels! Mint chocolate endorphins! Boysenberry swirl happiness! Neopolitan (not the pasta sauce) niceness!